Ways to Manage Mum Guilt
Photo by Kristina Paukshtite
What is Mum Guilt?
Mum guilt is that nagging sense of anxiety, doubt, and self-blame that can arise when we feel like we are not doing enough for our children or that we are not living up to our own expectations of what it means to be a good mum. While it is a normal feeling, it can be overwhelming and can ultimately lead to burnout and mental health issues.
How to Manage Feelings of Mum Guilt
1. Recognize the source of the guilt
The first step to managing mum guilt is to identify its source. This can be difficult, as there may be multiple reasons as to why you feel guilty. Take some time to reflect on your feelings and try to pinpoint what triggers them. Is it the pressure to be a perfect mum? Or is it a fear of not being able to meet your child's needs? Do you put expectations on yourself or do they come from other people? Understanding the root cause of your guilt can help you address it more effectively.
2. Practice grace
One of the most effective ways to manage mum guilt is to practice giving yourself grace. This means treating yourself with the same kindness, concern, and understanding that you would offer to a good friend. Be gentle with yourself, acknowledge your efforts and achievements, and give yourself credit for the things you do well. Instead of focusing on what you could have done better, try to focus on the positive aspects of your parenting. This doesn’t mean that you don’t keep growing it just means that you make emotional space for imperfection.
3.Set realistic expectations
Many mums put immense pressure on themselves to be perfect, which is a completely unrealistic expectation that can lead to guilt and burnout. That’s why it’s essential to set realistic expectations for yourself and your kids. Understand that no one is perfect, and that parenting is a constant learning process. We have to accept that there will be good days and bad days, and try not to judge ourselves too harshly for the mistakes we make!
4. Seek support
Parenting at any stage can be challenging, and it is essential to seek support when you need it. Reach out to close friends, family, or a therapist if you feel overwhelmed or need someone to talk to. By surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people who can help you acknowledge and manage your guilt you’ll find that you’re not alone! It’s okay to ask for help and accept the encouragement you need.
5. Take care of yourself
Taking care of yourself is vital in managing mum guilt. And here at WO-MUM, we’re passionate about practicing self-care. Prioritize your physical and mental health by trying to eat well, exercising, and getting enough rest. Engage in activities that make you happy and give you a break from the stresses of parenting. When you prioritize taking care of yourself, you will feel more energized and better equipped to handle the challenges of motherhood.
Mum guilt is a normal feeling that many mothers experience, but it is possible to manage it. By recognizing the source of your guilt and practicing habits that emphasize grace for yourself, you can ease the burden of mum guilt and be the best mother you can be. Remember that you are doing your best! And at the end of that day, our best is really all we can do.